June 2020 – Literature, Poetry and Reading.

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I read Ties by Domenico Starnone and loved it, I was particularly interested in Days of Abandonment because both books explore the fallout of a husband’s fidelity. The book was an emotional ride for me, it was depressing and I loved it. Starnone and Ferrante are married to each other and both their books touch upon the theme of a husband who leaves his wife and two children for a younger woman. Both also involve an old neighbor and a pet. Ferrante explores the mental agony of the wife after her husband abandons her and the turbulent aftermath of the marital betrayal; whereas, Starnone writes about the mental agony of the wife, the husband and lastly the children in three parts.

The novel is set in Turin where Olga lives with her husband Mario, her children Illaria and Gianni and their dog Otto. One day, Mario declares that he does not want to be with her anymore. The novel captures the wife’s descent into madness and finally finding some semblance after her husband deserts her for a much younger woman. Their neighbour Carrano also plays a significant role in the novel. Reading the book was almost similar to experiencing a real life vertigo- Olga’s suffering throughout the novel was portrayed brilliantly. It was raw, vulnerable, and a true description of the id. There is no sugar coating. Olga has given her husband everything- she carried him through his education years to raising his children and their home (quoting Olga, “I had taken away my own time and added it to his, to make him more powerful. I had put aside my own aspirations to go along with his. At every crisis of despair I had set aside my own crises to comfort him. I had disappeared into his minutes, into his hours, so that he could concentrate“).

She mentions at one point “We don’t know anything about people, even those with whom we share everything“. The veils of marriage, striving to be perfect for one another, the facades of personalities and pretence of being someone else for the sake of one another are shattered one by one throughout the novel; if only Olga had displayed this vulnerable side within the marriage. Not giving spoilers but the novel does not end badly, Olga learns to move on, to accept that life outside Mario is possible (quoting Olga,”What a mistake, above all, it had been to believe that I couldn’t live without him, when for a long time I had not been at all certain that I was alive with him“). She realizes that she did not feel like herself with him, she felt like another version of him, always adjusting and evolving according to his needs and desires.

Concluding Thoughts

I’ve already mentioned how reading the novel was similar to experiencing a vertigo for me. All in all, Ferrante paints a terrific picture of a wife’s mental descent during the days of her abandonment. It was beautiful, raw and visceral. Moreover, it is a reminder of how fragile human relationships are, how indecipherable people can be and how overcoming is difficult yet possible.

Domenico Starnone's New Novel Is Also a Piece in the Elena ...

****.5/5

I just finished reading Ties earlier toady, thus completing 20 books this year. More than the number of books, the quality and diversity of books that I read matter more to me. So I’ve been reading a number of books at once- Once and Forever: The Tales of Kenji Miyazawa by Kenji Miyazawa, Interpreter of Maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri, Invisible Women: Exposing Data Bias in a World Designed for Men by Caroline Criado-Perez and Modern Love. As much as I want to finish An Unquiet Mind: A Memoir of Moods and Madness by Kay Redfield Jaminson, my mind is inching closer to DNF’ing it.

If you’re reading Ties, please start by reading the Introduction by Lahiri, it provides some context to the family of Vanda, Aldo, Sandro and Anna and their tumultuous relationships with one another and as a family. Read it also because it is an interesting anecdote about Lahiri’s tryst with the book.

“Ties” is a story of a marriage and but also extends to other relationships, such as one with children, and lovers outside marriage. The book speaks about empty spaces, dead ends and about the communication that is dead between spouses. There is a lot more to it which seethes under the surface as beautifully imagined by Starnone. Think of the book, Starnone’s writing and Lahiri’s translation as a puff pastry- there are so many layers to it, when you eat it you don’t realize, but the moment someone takes you through the process of making that perfect puff pastry you realize the intricacies of making the pastry, the umpteen number of layers. The book is exactly like that, in the beginning it does not strike you as anything extraordinary. As you start progressing and as the author takes you through the different viewpoints of the characters, you understand the underlying emotions, the fault lines and everything in between. Starnone delves deep into the hearts and minds of the characters and makes the ordinary, extraordinary. It is a multi-faceted story about a broken marriage with children as its innocent victims. It is about what works, what doesn’t, who pretends and who doesn’t.

Concluding Thoughts

I loved Ties, it is one of those novels that just covered me with a sense of equanimity and warmth. I do not understand Italian but Lahiri’s translation of the book did not feel inadequate anywhere throughout the novel which is often the case with translated works. What disappointed me about the book was the characters’ reluctance to communicate effectively with one another, it was always expressed through frustration and repression, but maybe that’s the beauty of it. Domenico Starnone is married to Elena Ferrante who is the author of The Days of Abandonment, another story about a broken marriage, so I am really looking forward to reading that one next.

Month: June 2020

“The circle of an empty day is brutal…”: Days of Abandonment by Elena Ferrante tr. by Ann Goldstein

Domonico Starnone, Ties (Translated by Jhumpa Lahiri from the Italian ‘Lacci’)